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Oh No! Don’t Tell Me You’re A Birther!

You really have to hand it to Liberals when it comes to picking conspiracies. They do have some doozies. Yet they think that theirs are intellectual and legitimate while any that Conservatives come up with are loony. Liberals also have a certain unsavory predilection for handing out insulting, and all too often vulgar, names to those of us who think against their grain. When dealing with these far Left conspiracies we must always remember; while Conservatives think, Liberals ‘feel.’

For example look at how the Liberals ‘feel’ about Hurricane Katrina:

Liberals feel that they are being intellectually scientific when they say that the Bush administration was responsible for an unnatural increase of hurricane activity and the heightened severity of these hurricanes during his administration. They will look you straight in the eye and tell you that Bush ordered the US Navy to destroy the levees of a US city, New Orleans. I believe they claim that it was the battleship Iowa that was doing most the dirty work. Then they complain that the ridiculously bureaucratic FEMA’s slow response was all due to racism by the Bush administration. It would be totally ridiculous and impossible for a President to do what these Liberals ‘feel’ he has done, but then being ridiculous is an inalienable right for Liberals.

To Liberals it doesn’t matter that hurricanes have historically followed a natural pattern of increasing and decreasing activities, or that such hurricanes also historically follow a natural pattern in the increasing and decreasing of their strength and severity. That’s just too much science, and every Liberal knows that Bush hated science so much that he outlawed it during his administration.

Apparently Liberals know nothing about being on a ship in the midst of a hurricane or typhoon. One of the few stories my father related to me about his days in WW II was of being caught in that infamous typhoon off the Japanese Islands in the spring of 1945 and of how his destroyer just missed by a few degrees from being rolled over. Our Navy lost a lot of good ships and brave men in that typhoon but Liberals may have never heard of such a thing so perhaps they don’t realize how dangerous the high winds and waves of a typhoon or hurricane can be to a ship at sea. Still, according to Liberals there were our Navy’s ships out in that violent storm just off the Louisiana coast during Hurricane Katrina bombarding the city.

Liberals also must not have a clue about windage and elevation when it comes to shooting guns. Be it BB guns to the big guns on battleships, wind, rain, temperature and the weather in general all affect where the rounds end up. In a hurricane it must be near impossible to hit anything, especially levees that are miles away and that are being fired at by ships in distress. Liberals could learn about how weather affects the accuracy of a round, big or small, like I did in the Marine Corps. But then if they are not so inclined to enlist for a few years perhaps they could just watch the movie ‘Sergeant York.’

If Conservatives are dealing with minorities then as far as Liberals are concerned everything comes down to race. Minorities don’t even cry racism as much as Liberals. Concerning FEMA during Katrina, for Liberals the overbearing bureaucracy and overwhelming logistics had nothing to do with FEMA’s slow response, for FEMA’s late arrival was all due to Bush’s supposed racism.

Other Liberal conspiracies say that Bush knew about the attacks of 9-11 before they happened. Or Liberals even believe that the Bush administration was behind the attacks and that he ordered the deaths of over 3000 people so that he could attack Iraq. Then there’s the one where Osama bin Laden is actually a CIA operative who was given the go ahead by Americans to kill Americans. Of course these theories are utterly absurd but that doesn’t stop the Libbies from demanding investigations.

When it comes to their Global Warming conspiracy for some reason Liberals are not even as smart as the first cavemen. Even cavemen knew that when the Sun came up the Earth got hotter and when the Sun went down the Earth cooled off. I mean it’s like the difference between night and day! Yet Liberals now disregard the natural influence of the Sun and its historical surface changes that affect the ever so slight fluctuations of the Earth’s temperatures, such as increasing and decreasing sun spot activities, resulting in the natural and non-fatal influence upon the Earth. Instead Liberals choose to believe that the Earth is getting hotter because earthworms and cows flatulent too much and so to save the Earth all non-Liberal humans need to stop breathing.

Liberals also believe that America faked the Moon landings and that fifty years of space exploration has all been conducted in a New Mexico barn.

These are all Liberal causes that any sane person finds absurd and annoying. Yet Liberals think that they hold the intellectual high ground so when American taxpayers show up at Town Hall Meetings to protest the dangerous Congressional spending they are ridiculed as being uncivil and are referred to in such derogatory terms as the Mob, Racists and Nazis.

Again when other American Patriots protest the insane Liberal spending policies of our government, Liberals claim that these Tea Parties are Astroturf movements generated by Fox News and other far rightwing organizations. The participants are labeled as racists, lunatics, Nazis and fools. In displaying their penchant for vulgarity and to villainously mock their fellow countrymen Liberals use a homosexual slang term for an obscene sex act by calling these upset taxpayers, Teabaggers, how clever.

Likewise Liberals believe that anyone who does not approve of Obama and his policies are racists. Therefore they must also ‘feel’ that the only reason Obama did not get 100% of the vote in the last election is because America is such a racist nation!

Liberals believe that Fox News is a biased rightwing conspiracy designed to ruin Obama, his administration, agenda and reputation, but feel that the unashamed, biased bootlicking at MSNBC is just honest, unbiased journalism.

And while Liberals can unabashedly claim that President Bush attacked US cities and murdered US citizens, they declare the complete insanity of the Americans who are simply demanding to see a sitting President’s birth certificate proving that he is rightly a natural born citizen of the United States as required by the Constitution. These Patriots are mockingly referred to by Liberals as “birthers” and how dare they even question the constitutional legality of their Chosen One!

Imagine a man comes home from a hard day at the office and his wife immediately meets him at the front door. She is all decked out in a beautiful black and red evening dress with shimmering black pumps and is wearing a diamond necklace with matching earrings.

“Honey,” she says sweetly. “Tonight you are going to keep your promise and take me to that Broadway Show and out to dinner.”

“Ah…ah…” The man mumbles while wishing he had brought his Teleprompters home with him. “I’m afraid… ah… we can’t… ah… do that… ah… we… ah… don’t… ah… have the… ah…ah… money.”

“What are you talking about,” she fires back. “Of course we do, wait a minute… Barry! What have you been up to?”

“Well… ah… you see Baby… ah… it’s those…ah… those damn birthers… ah… they just… ah… won’t leave me alone… ah… ah… ah… oh hell… ah… I just spent 1.7 million to… ah… keep my… ah… birth certificate hidden… ah…so …ah… there. But… ah… Baby… ah… I did it for you Baby… ah…”

“Well, we’re goin’ so you call your office and tell them that tonight’s on the US taxpayers… but we’re goin’!”

“Ah… yes… ah… sir… ah… Baby.” He replies as he picks up the phone, “Hello Rahm…”

And therein lies my biggest problem with your president’s refusal to produce his original birth certificate.

Why on Earth would anybody spend 1.7 million dollars, and climbing, to hide his birth certificate if it truly does prove that he is a natural born US citizen and is eligible to hold the office of President of The United States? Well, they wouldn’t so why is Obama withholding his? As it stands now the only two things that are increasing more than Barry’s B.C. legal fees are the national deficit and the unemployment rate.

If Obama was really born in Hawaii his actions of hiding a legitimate US birth certificate defies all logic. Likewise in a time of financial crisis for the rest of us his wasting of 1.7 million to hide what millions of other Americans must produce on a daily basis on demand by a hundred different government agencies, and for a lot less important issues than being the President, is fiscally appalling to those of us just trying to meet the rent.

His refusal to follow through with his repeated promises of an administration of unequaled “transparency” would be laughable if it didn’t display his galling arrogance and his utter distain towards the American people. Don’t the citizens of this country have the right to know that their President was actually born here? Well…yes we do, so what’s the problem Junior?

Financially the Obama’s are not hurting but by no means are they to be considered rich. Besides no matter how rich he might be, no sane man wastes 1.7 million to hide his legitimate US birth certificate unless there is a very good reason why he does not want it to be shown. If in some future date he produces this document showing that he was actually born in Hawaii and then gives some lame excuse for not showing it before he spent millions to hide it, then every American who has been unemployed or going without because of our depressed economy should get a chance to kick his butt.

Here’s a thought; perhaps Obama was given the Nobel Peace Prize as a way for the Nobel Committee to donate the 1.5 million check that goes along with it to Junior’s birth certificate legal fees? Makes more sense than anything else I’ve heard of why this no-show won it.

Liberals will tell you that he has given us a B.C. but that is not true. What he has given us is a simple form from Hawaii that simply states he is alive. My son got the same thing for his daughter when he received custody of her in Hawaii. It took him twenty minutes at Public Records and cost ten bucks, twenty if you include the outrageous Honolulu parking fees. He needed it to insure that his daughter could leave the state without any hassles and his ex wouldn’t give up the hospital B.C. So what Barry has given as proof of his citizenship is a ten-dollar live birth declaration and 1.7 million in lawyers’ fees. Maybe that’s part of Barry’s back to work plan, by keeping a few more lawyers busy with this simple nonsense.

There are all other kinds of problems with this B. C. issue, like were his parents married or not at the time of his birth. Did Junior give up his US citizenship when he became Barry Soetoro? His paternal grandmother swears that she was present in Kenya when young B. H. O. Jr. was born and there is a plaque in the Kenyan hospital commemorating his birth there.

One of the most intriguing issues of Junior’s citizenship concerns his world travels as a young man with a passport of unknown announced citizenship. Like his school records and transcripts, that passport information apparently didn’t fall under Obama’s promise of transparency either. Besides not knowing how a struggling twenty-year old student like Barry Jr. could afford such an extended trip abroad, during this trip in 1981 he also traveled to Pakistan when no US citizens were allowed to enter Pakistan by the United States’ government. Oh please explain to me how the Magic One managed such a James Bondian feat, birther bashers. Inquiring minds want to know!

Personally I have never owned a passport as all of my International travel was arranged through the famous Marine Corps’ Travel Agency. That has some disadvantages like you don’t really get to choose where they are sending you. However, one huge advantage is that not only are you required to carry a weapon upon arrival, you get to use it. But even then you have to produce a birth certificate way back in the beginning of this process at that bastion of truth and confidentiality, the recruiter’s office. The Marine Corps’ Travel Agency could have gotten my Brothers and I into Pakistan in 1981, if the need had arisen, but Barry wasn’t in that same position, so how did he get into Pakistan as a US citizen? Maybe he crossed into Pakistan at the Afghani border disguised as a Taliban refugee? That would help to explain some of those pictures of his trip.

By the way, just about anyone can get a copy of my service records, so why can’t a judge get a copy of Barry’s birth certificate?

Liberals will also tell you that if the birth certificate was really a problem that the Democrats and their media would have found out about it when they vetted him. But that’s a joke right? I mean everybody knows that the Dems and their lapdog media never even came close to vetting this guy; they made a lot of excuses for him though. Too bad the voters didn’t vet him either.

Next the Libs tell us that if this issue really was a problem that certainly the Republicans would have used it against Obama in the last election. And if not the Republicans then Hillary sure would have brought it up. But the trouble with this lame excuse is that the Hill Pill and the McCain campaign did mention this birth certificate issue. The results were an immediate superficial cry of racism by the Liberals, the Obama campaign and their adoring press so everybody dropped it quicker than Henry Gates can bad mouth a White cops Mama!

Lastly Liberals will point out how judges all over the country are throwing out these cases to get Obama’s B.C. made public as proof that there is nothing to the conspiracy. Wrong, judges throw out rightful cases on legal technicalities everyday, and most of these cases have been dismissed because of some technicality.

The latest judge to throw out a B.C. case was a Clinton appointee, in California no less, so two strikes against the challengers right there, on the grounds that no court could rule on a the legitimacy of a sitting president, strike three. The fact that this judge so violently condemned the ‘birthers’ only points out where his already obvious sympathies lies. It has also been stated that the Hawaiian Republican Governor has sealed Obama’s hospital birth certificate. So what? To be the first Republican Governor in the ultra liberal state of Hawaii in forty-eight years you can bet she is at the most a Centralist. Besides the Governor is simply obeying Hawaiian law that states only Obama, his descendants or a person with a court order can get a copy of Obama’s birth certificate. Plus orders from the White House must be obeyed by a Governor in Hawaii just like they must be obeyed by… oh let’s say, a Commanding General in Afghanistan. Neither order is pleasant to follow as one has to hide something and the other must put his troops’ safety at risk and wait, and wait, and wait, and…

It’s Chicago politics folks and the mere fact that Barry, Jr. has spent so much money to hide what the Liberals claim is a document proving Junior is a natural born US citizen only adds credence to the belief that he is not. Liberals think that those among us who want prove that Obama is a natural born US citizen, as our Constitution requires, are a joke. But Obama talking about truth, honesty, transparency and “an end to the old ways of Washington politics” are the only jokes in this issue, not the “birthers.”

Show Us The Birth Certificate!

God Bless America

Semper Fi,


“Copyright 2009.  Michael E. Tank   All rights reserved. No part of this document may be copied, faxed, electronically transmitted, or in any other manner duplicated without express written permission of the author.”



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